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Best Kept Sex Secrets

Go from ordinary to extraordinary with these sex tips. Go from ordinary to extraordinary with these sex tips.

You’ve got a beautiful naked woman in your bed. She’s smiling at you seductively while her hands smooth down the sheets beside her in invitation. You’ve waited for this night for months and it’s finally here...and you’re scared to death.

Ever been in a situation like that? Even if you’re an experienced lover - unless you’re Don Juan – you’ve probably had your moments of doubt in the bedroom. Perhaps when it’s over and you’ve done the deed, you congratulate yourself and tell that insecure voice in your head to take a hike. But does it listen? Here are two sex secrets guaranteed to banish self-doubt forever.

It’s All About the Kiss

On an episode of Friends, Joey and the guys tried to explain the issue of kissing to the girls. Although the men don’t mind kissing, they view it as just a necessary step to get sex. Chandler compares kissing to the comedian that comes out to entertain audiences before a concert. Ross adds that while they like the comedian, it’s “not why we bought the ticket.” The guys further point out that after the “concert” (sex) is over, the girl wants to bring out the “comedian” (kissing) again. In other words, guys don’t place much importance on kissing.

Big mistake. Kissing is a crucial element to lovemaking, and has extreme value. Dr Gordon Gallup, a psychologist at the University of Albany, explains, “Kissing has a lot of power – it can either promote or negate the continuation of a relationship.” Studies suggest being a great kisser dramatically increases the frequency and quality of your bedroom bliss. Dr. Gallup stated the more persistent you are with kisses, the more sex you’ll have. If you’re primarily using kissing as a means to an end (getting her in the sack), you’re selling yourself (and her) short.

If you don’t take kissing seriously, as Rachel explains to Ross and the guys - and don’t “bring the comedian back out,” you could very well be left to “listen to that album alone.” (Get the picture?) Unless you want to spend lonely nights with just yourself for company, it’s time to work on your stand-up comedy.

Let the Moment Build

If you come home, eat supper, watch football on TV, play a little Xbox and then expect your girlfriend or wife to be waiting with open arms – you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. Even if you are lucky enough to – well, get lucky - the sex won’t be as spectacular as it could be.

Tension needs to build for sex to be completely satisfying for both partners. Obviously there are those gotta-have-you-right-now moments, but if you’re consistently jumping straight to the good stuff, your sex life will suffer.

Take the time to get your girl in the mood well in advance. Send her suggestive text messages or sexy emails. Call her during lunch and tell her you can’t wait to strip her naked. Engage in steamy foreplay throughout the day, as much and as often as you can. Everything you do to set the scene will make sex that much more explosive.

If you take these two sex secrets for granted, you’ll never get rid of that nagging voice of self-doubt. Once you master the art of kissing and make foreplay a continual part of your day, you’ll realize how much you’ve been missing. And you’ll never go back to boring sex again.

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Last modified on Monday, 24 September 2012 17:54

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